Evident From My Blog Title

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.

~Anatole France

Life has a strange timing of granting your wishes- it makes them come true when you are spewing cynicism and the light at the end of the tunnel seems like another mirage. The break that I have been cribbing about landed on my lap when I had come to accept the monotony of my life.

Although the planning had been on for a week, given my reputation of flopped plans [:D], I tried not to get overtly excited about the whole thing. As the week progressed, I saw the location change three times and the number of people dwindle from ten to five. Had it not been for a very determined group of five people desperate to make it a success, this trip would never had happened. And I am glad, it did not fall apart.

We did the usual touristy things- roamed around the market, shopped for sovereigns, saw the same mountain from five different points/locations and went boating. There were moments when we simply sat on the edge, looked across the horizon, five people lost in thoughts and musings of their own.

I realised I travel differently- the excitement of seeking familiarity is more than that of discovering new places. Here, staring out of the window opening to a postcard-perfect view, I could not help thinking about settling there and writing a book, roaming around on cold mornings in the twisted alleys, cupping hot tea glasses for warmth and reading Robert Frost poems in the dead of night.

My memories are not of the perfect landscapes I witnessed but of laughing till my sides hurt, of endless brooding over life's unnecessary complications, of comfortable silences and of feeling something stir within. This is what I seek in a trip and from what I know, the journey has just begun.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -

I took the one less traveled by

And that has made all the difference.

~ Robert Frost

Little Pockets of Hope

"Hope" is the thing with feathers

That perches in the soulAnd sings the tune without the wordsAnd never stops at allAnd sweetest in the Gale is heardAnd sore must be the stormThat could abash the little BirdThat kept so many warmI've heard it in the chillest landAnd on the strangest SeaYet, never, in Extremity,It asked a crumb of Me.~Emily Dickinson

It has happened so on numerous occasions that I tuck my hands in my pocket only to discover a princely ten rupees note or a toffee or a train ticket with some memorable journey printed on it. It never ceases to amaze me that such a tiny discovery can make you smile or take you back in time. It has all but reinforced one life lesson- When in doubt, look within!

There have been desperate times when I am so unclear about what to do and just like that, I stare pensively out of the window only to hear 'Tu Na Jaane Aas Pass Hai Khuda' stream in melodies into me. Or when I am travelling in an auto, mulling over some issue, when I see a Scorpio pass by, with a picture my favorite deity plastered on the window. Or when I am in a particularly upset over a tiff when the timeline throws up a tweet 'There is never a moment when God is not in control', asking me to let go. Or when I am sitting dejected in the hall, absentmindedly surfing channels, when the neighbor's two year old kid walks in and takes my hand, as if acknowledging my pain.

I cling to these little moments of hope and they seem to have immense potential to rescue me from the dungeons of gloom. Over so many years, I have seen my attitude towards bad times undergo noticeable, if not radical, change. Someone else might have dismissed the kid's action as merely a cute gesture but I chose to look at it differently- it was more of a positive sign offering much needed assurance as I saw it. But believe me, they go a long way in uplifting your mood and in a way, your circumstances.

At some point, we all need our 'Aal iz well' moments in life. All you need to do is look into your pockets for that one sign. Go search yours.