Kids no longer.......

I am a classic proof of having an idle mind but a devil’s workshop. I was fortunate (?) enough to have a month long break from college, but in my case it was more of a curse. The only good thing that happened to me during my previous vacations was that I gained a few kilos and hence when the college resumed, I did not resemble a malnourished kid. I really don’t know what went wrong in this vacation, for I have lost weight. I almost fainted when the needles tipped at 46 kilograms-that’s 7 kgs underweight. So in short, I ended up doing nothing constructive, instead scheming plots to survive my last one year in college.

I never realized when my thoughts veered towards my future. I am 21, so it is quite natural to think about the future which seems pretty bleak because till now I haven’t yet got a job offer. And I am still confused whether to opt for an MBA or go for M.Tech degree. As if this was not enough, my mind entered into really scary territory-marriage. It is only a matter of few years before I get booted out of my own house. Hehe. So my idle mind wandered a little more and I conjured up a list of things which my kids (What? Of course I am going to have kids. According to our society, you get married to have kids…) will miss out on growing up. In a broader sense it applies to our next generation. Here it goes kiddos-

1. Waking up one fine day and your mom allowing you to bunk school. No, no, no sweetheart, you can’t bunk it because your parents have spent an obscene amount on getting you educated at some neighbourhood school which incidentally is the mecca of rote learning.
2. Instead of asking for buttered paranthas, you ask for money to have transfat laden pizzas, samosas et al at your canteen.
3. Spending your vacations at your native place because you will be busy preparing for your next class. Duh.
4. Getting a scratch, bruise or gash and being proud of it. Because you will be clad in helmets, knee pads and what not while you are cycling thanks to your overprotective parents.
5. Waking up one fine noon to the sound of advertisements or announcements blaring on some over-amplified speakers passing through your street on an auto. That was some way of publicity I tell you.
6. Dancing like hell during Ganpati viserjan because you think it is too wild for your senses.
7. Climbing fences and stealing mangoes because the farm owner has installed electric fencing.
8. Enjoying roadside stuff with an iron-clad stomach while it’s pouring.
9. Being able to stumble upon your parent’s wedding album and being elated at the discovery. Because the photos nowadays are digitized and stored away at the mercy of your hard disk.
10. Solving a Rubik’s cube with insane concentration because unlike us, you have already seen how to solve it on YouTube. Damn.
11. Feeling the thrill of reading Champak and Gokulam (which you smuggled from your friend) under the covers when everyone else is sleeping. That’s because you have a monthly subscription of the same magazines.
12. Wading through ankle length waters. Instead the water will be neck deep because some moron at BMC failed to give orders to clean up the drains.
13. Hearing a cuckoo or spotting a sparrow.
14. Wolf-whistling roadside romeos. They are too busy in counseling sessions. Hmmm…. A good thing at last.
15. Having I-pods surgically attached to your ears because you can’t bear natural sounds.

Phew, that’s quite an exhaustive list I guess. But I guess the most important thing they will miss is being humane….I just hope our next generation has enough of compassion and honesty left in them because it not easy being all goody-goody in this world. Kalyug hai bhai, kalyug.